Do you believe you've got the power to create the life of your dreams? Do you think you have control over how you're treated? Over your experiences? The answer is yes. Even if you don't see how, the answer is yes. This is reflected in the following paradigms.
What exactly is a paradigm and why is it important? A paradigm is a guideline. It's a basis for how we operate in daily life and can determine how we deal with and react to things. It is not a rule or a law, simply a suggestion to look at things a different way. Think of it as a sort of life framework.
The following are some paradigms that I live by and I coach by. Some of these are fairly simple, while others may be more challenging. You do not have to agree with these. We are all entitled to our own opinion and we each have a unique way of seeing the world, but I hope these create a conversation. That they give you a perspective shift and make you question the paradigms you live by (even if you're not yet aware of them).
1. How You Do One Thing Is How You Do Everything.
This one is a biggie! I firmly believe that how you do one thing is how you do everything... meaning if you tend to be really lazy with your finances, there's a good chance that laziness spills over into relationships, fitness, career, etc. At the same time if you are always making lists, checking things off, and being very detailed with your work, that is likely how you're showing up in every other aspect of life as well. This means if you're wanting to improve your life in one area, you have to look at the big picture.
2. All Behavior And Experience Has A Positive Intention.
Have you ever been let down? Heartbroken? Disappointed? Of course you have, that's just part of being human. But have you ever thought of all the positive things that have come out of these negative experiences? Often it's not obvious at first, but seemingly difficult experiences can be some of our biggest teachers and lead us to some amazing opportunities.
Same with behaviours. Eating a tub of ice cream every night seems like a negative behaviour, but what if the positive intention behind that is to create a feeling of love and happiness? The intention is good, but the behaviour is potentially harmful to our health. Finding the positive intention means you can modify the behaviour and get the same result. Do something different but get the same feeling.
3. Everyone Is Winning The Game They Are Playing.
I LOVE this one! This took me a little while to wrap my head around, but essentially it means if you want to succeed you will, and if you want to fail you will. I'm not talking on a conscious level, but more subconsciously. For example say that you have a goal of losing 20lbs. You want this for yourself, but you know that losing that weight may mean you'll be seen differently and that you may not belong in your friends group anymore. It's almost certain that you won't meet that weight loss goal. You will create blocks because belonging is way more important that losing weight. I want to repeat that most of the time this is not a conscious thing. On the surface we often don't understand why we're not reaching our goals. But underneath there is always a reason why.
4. If you want things to be different, you have to do different things.
Pretty self-explanatory but not as easy as it sounds. You want to change your health? Adjust your mindset? You can't keep everything in your life the same and expect something to change. Often this means reaching higher and getting out of your comfort zone. Changing what you do to get a different result!
5. How People love, value & respect you is a direct reflection of how you love, value, and respect yourself.
We teach people how to treat us. If we treat ourselves like crap with unhealthy foods, bad habits and negative self-talk then we are telling the world this is what we want and deserve. Remember, actions speak louder than words. If you want better from those in your life, it's got to start with you.
This is part 1 of the paradigms I life and coach by. The post was simply too big and juicy to squeeze them all in! Stay tuned next week when I dive even deeper and answer the question: "What makes you so uniquely broken?"
PS. Want to keep in touch? Have questions? Don't hesitate to reach out!